Clarification Of The Lockdown Rules (Just Playing Our Part)

1. You must not leave the house for any reason, but, if you have a reason, you can leave the house.

2. Masks are useless at protecting you against the virus, but you may have to wear one because it can save lives, but they may not work, but they may be mandatory, but maybe not. 

3. Shops are closed, except for those shops that are open.

4. You should not go to the doctor’s or to the hospital unless you have to go there, unless you are too poorly to go there.

5. This virus can kill people, but don’t be scared of it. It can only kill those people who are vulnerable or those people who are not vulnerable. It’s possible to contain and control it, sometimes, except that sometimes it actually leads to a global disaster.

6. Gloves won’t help, but they can still help, so wear them sometimes, or not.

7. There is no shortage of groceries in the supermarkets, but there are many things missing or in short supply. You shouldn’t buy loo rolls, but you should buy some just in case you need some. They won’t run out in supermarkets, but, if they do, don’t buy them.

8. The virus has no effect on children, except those children it affects.

9. Animals are not affected, but there was a cat that tested positive in Belgium in February when no-one had been tested, plus a few tigers here and there.

10. Stay 2 metres away from tigers. Also stay 2 metres away from people, as they might also be dangerous for many reasons as well as infectious – but probably more dangerous and more likely to be infectious than a tiger.

11. You could have many symptoms if you get the virus, but you can also get symptoms without getting the virus, get the virus without having any symptoms or be contagious without having symptoms, or be non-contagious with symptoms. If you do have symptoms, these can vary from mild to severe – just like most other illnesses. You might not even notice that you have symptoms, but you might die, which you probably will notice and others in your household will also notice.

12. To help protect yourself you should eat well and exercise. Eat whatever you have on hand, as it’s better not to go to the shops, unless you need toilet roll or a fence panel.

13. It’s important to get fresh air, but don’t sit down, except if you are old, but not for too long, or if you are pregnant, or if you’re not old or pregnant but need to sit down. If you do sit down, don’t eat your picnic, unless you have a picnic with you – in which case – you can eat it.

14. Don’t visit old people, but you have to take care of the old people and bring them food and medication, so do visit them regularly.

15. You can’t see your elderly mother or grandmother, but they can take a taxi and meet an elderly taxi driver or a young taxi driver. You can see your elderly relatives through a window – a bit like the taxi driver does.

16. The virus remains active on different surfaces for two hours … or four hours … or six hours … I mean days, not hours. But it needs a damp environment. Or a cold environment that is warm and dry. It also remains in the air, but only for short periods as long as the air is not in contact with plastic.

17. If you need to home-educate your children, you can start drinking alcohol at 10am if you wish.

18. If you are not home educating children, you can also start drinking at 10am.

19. The number of corona-related deaths will be announced daily but we don’t know how many people are infected as they are only testing those who are almost dead to find out if that’s what they will die of. If they actually do die, we won’t waste the test on them, so we might not know if that is why they died. Therefore, the people who die of corona aren’t counted, won’t or will be counted, but maybe not and probably will not be, but will.

20. We should stay in locked down until the virus stops infecting people, but it will only stop infecting people if we all get infected, so it’s important we get infected and some don’t get infected and maybe never will.

21. No business will collapse due to coronavirus, except those businesses that will collapse due to coronavirus.

22. You can have dates in supermarket queues during your necessary food shopping trip, if they happen to coincide and if you use the same supermarket, but you must not queue together, but you shouldn’t go on dates unless it is absolutely necessary.

We hope that makes things clearer for you.

Kind Regards

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John Harrison  

PUBLISHERS NOTICE

PUBLISHERS NOTICE  

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Dear Streetwise Customer

I hope that you and your family are well. 

I don’t have to tell you that the Coronavirus outbreak has changed everything, and nowhere more so than in the world of sports betting. With almost all our regular ‘go to’ profit makers like European football, horse racing and golf on hold, you might be excused for thinking that the opportunity to make a lucrative extra income from sports betting was gone – at least for now. 

That’s what we thought until we heard from a guy called Craig Russell and how he was…

Making an extra £150-£250 a week exploiting the ‘invisible’ betting opportunities exposed by the Coronavirus mayhem.

You see Craig isn’t your typical sports bettor. Long before anyone had heard of coronavirus, he was shunning the sort of events most of us bet on in favour of little-known sports, events and fixtures taking place in obscure locations.

Why did he concentrate on those? 

Because he figured that the less ‘pro’s’  there  were  looking  at  these  obscure markets, and the more time he spent studying them, the greater edge he’d have over the competition. 

Obvious when you think about it. 

So why this message? 

Because it seems like now is the perfect time to bring this to a wider audience…but not much wider! 

You see, in conjunction with Craig we’ve put together a totally unique service which is tailor-made for the times we find ourselves in. But there will only be 100 places available. Ever.

For full details on what’s involved and why the limit, take a LOOK NOW.

If an extra couple of hundred pounds tax-free income would be worthwhile to you right now, I’d urge you to get in touch without delay. These places are really going to go fast.  

  For full details CLICK HERE

  Very Best Wishes, 

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 John Harrison
  Streetwise Publications 

P.S   Almost forgot…you can get started with this for just £9.95.  I’m pretty sure that makes it our cheapest service ever. Why? Well take a look now and all will be revealed.

www.streetwisenews.com/LP